Dearest soulmate,
It's practically here! Officially one day before our 2 year anniversary. {Give or take multiple hours where it's not almost 3am. Whoops.} I'm not sure that I'll post again before our anniversary, because I have things to do beforehand.
No worries, I'm making sure you get a nice card {cough BOOK cough} slash of course my nails need to actually look good for once. And maybe I'll write on here more later. Not sure yet. I also like the intimacy of a handwritten book {like I did before this} so we'll see.
But let's get back to that whole {almost two years!!!} thing.
It's amazing. That's 730 days. Not much in comparison to how many more years/days we have ahead of us, but it's so incredible.
When I was younger, I vowed that I wouldn't just date around. I would really strive to find a good relationship and stick to it. Granted, I didn't really know what love was back then. So I got mixed up. {A lot.}
But I think - well, I know God had a giant hand in things. Maybe it's because He knew that me making that "vow" would preserve something special that would eventually lead into our relationship. Or maybe it was about showing me that true love really does exist. Whatever the true reason - He had you in mind.
Something that a lot of people are shocked to hear? I'd never kissed anyone until you. Something they're even more shocked about? You waited 20 years to find the right girl to give your first kiss away to.
I'm incredibly honored that you did that. I'm amazed that someone like you found me and fell in love. I don't even feel like I'm worth the astounding amount of love you put forth, but believe me, I love you so much.
I would say that I couldn't love you more, but I know that as the days, years, even decades go by, I know that my love for you will grow more than I'd ever thought possible.
When I started to like you, way back in 2012, I gave everything up to God. I told Him that if I wasn't meant to be with you {because I was used to rejection by boys}, that He just take away my feelings. I knew that I liked you way too much already to be able to deal with more rejection. {Mind you, this was at the beginning of us working together - maybe even before we worked together.}
But those feelings never went away. You would walk into a room and I could barely look up without getting butterflies. That amazing smelling cologne would waft into the room and I'd have to pace myself.
I was fascinated by you. You were, and are, everything I've ever wanted in a man. And there's the thing - you're a man. Not a boy, like the people I'd previously pursued. You not only were ready for a serious relationship, but you also immediately treated me like a lady.
I almost thought you were too good to be true. Was I dreaming? Nope. You're literally that amazing.
You're not just my "other half". You're what completes me. Because sometimes people can have an other half who doesn't fully complete them.
As soon as we admitted we loved each other, immediately I felt myself changing for the better. A lot of it has to do with the fact that you make me truly happy. I've never smiled so big as when I'm with you.
I don't know if you've heard them say it, but all my friends and family know that we're meant to be - that we're the perfect couple. We just found each other and everything clicked. They've noticed that about us.
One of my favorite comments on our relationship was that someone had never seen you smile like that before. I'd like to think that I've made you happy like that.
I really hope you know that I've never been this in love. I never even got excited about having a wedding and could actually see it happening before you. You've brought this whole new level of happiness to my life that I can't even explain. I feel like I don't even have a good enough vocabulary to describe it.
You know how to make my tears stop, you know how to push my buttons {for fun}, you know how to make me smile - you know everything about me. I've opened up to you more than anyone else because I actually want to share my life with you.
When we get married, I can't wait to come home and see your smiling face, and just envelop myself in your arms. That's when I'll really feel at home.
I don't know how you did it, but it's like you put me under a spell. I'm infatuated with you, in the best way possible. To feel that and receive those feelings back from the one you love... that's really the best feeling in the world.
So tomorrow morning, we're going to see each other, I'm going to hug you as tight as I can, kiss you because you deserve to be kissed as often as possible, and we're going to go on an amazing adventure. It'll be amazing because we'll be together.
I'm so beyond excited. {This week couldn't have gone slower, to be honest.}
This whole year was filled with ups and downs {in other areas of life - but we've been amazing.} but there's been one constant: that's you.
I mean, I've made mistakes {that beautiful promise ring...sigh} and had my freak outs {thanks, school} but you've been so patient and understanding. I love that aspect about you, and I also love that everyone around you knows that fact too. {My family's pretty much obsessed with you, by the way. They know you're an amazing gentleman who is the perfect match for me.}
You have this character that makes me want to be a better person. You love me and constantly tell me to not focus on what I consider imperfections. You've taught me so much. And we have so many years to come.
Tomorrow is another year to add to our wonderful, exciting, beautiful relationship. Every year after that, I'm just going to love you more and more. {So be prepared.}
You're my best friend and you are my soulmate. We've got 2 years down - and an eternity to go.
I love you so much, Brandon Daniel Morris. Happy {less than 24 hours till our} 2nd anniversary.
yours then, now, and for the rest of my life,
Meredith Grace Essmann
Saturday, September 27, 2014
Thursday, September 25, 2014
source of happiness
You know, whenever I see you, I get really happy. And not just the "oh cool, he's here" kind of thing.
I don't know if you've realized it, but I can be a lonely person. I've never known how to show affection to other people - probably just a little too shy. I always get excited when I meet new people because I see potential friends.
A lot of people think I'm standoffish though, because I'm one of those introverts who's better at dealing with people individually, rather than in a group. Doesn't mean I don't like people.
But you... you're my sunshine. I am so perfectly comfortable around you that sometimes, family members have been shocked at how open I am with you.
And that's the thing - I can't not be open with you. I want to tell you everything because you're the one person I know who'll understand. That and I know you care about what I have to say.
Right now, at 2:30 AM, we are currently two days {!!!} away from our anniversary. I don't think I have to remind you about how stoked I am. But it's not about the presents you've been threatening me with or the fact that you're amazing at surprises - I'm just happy to have you to myself for a whole day.
I'm sure you know that by now. But your presence is so fantastic.
For example. Sometimes, someone will say something funny, but I find it a little difficult to laugh out loud. It maybe takes a pretty good joke to get me to actually laugh out loud. But I find you so hilarious. You just shock me with how many amusing things you have to say.
I love it, because I really do love to laugh. I have a goofy laugh, and maybe that's part of the reason why I keep it hidden.
You definitely know how to make me laugh, though. I appreciate that tons.
Your smile, too. And your eyes. They sparkle {in a good way} when you laugh. I like to make you laugh too. And I know I've done well when you slap your knee. It's great.
Ugh, marrying you is going to be so perfect. You're so cute when we talk about that as well. Once, I wanted you to envision our wedding day and you told me to stop because you were going to cry just thinking about it. {Again, in a good way, I presume...? Kidding.}
Our whole relationship is based off of making each other smile. I've never seen you cry, but as much as I say I want to see that... well if I really think about you crying, I don't actually want that to happen.
So. September 28th, 2014. You and me. It won't matter where we go because it'll be wonderful and romantic and I won't have one worry in my mind.
I'll hold your hand and go wherever you go, because I'm madly in love with you. You are an incredible man. Your heart is so big and you are so good to everyone you meet. Even if you don't like them, you manage to put on a handsome smile and make things work. {And don't worry, I'll always be here to lend an ear when you have stories about crazy people.}
I can't thank you enough for how you've impacted me and keep my world going. I love you so much, BDM.
yours,
m.g.e.
I don't know if you've realized it, but I can be a lonely person. I've never known how to show affection to other people - probably just a little too shy. I always get excited when I meet new people because I see potential friends.
A lot of people think I'm standoffish though, because I'm one of those introverts who's better at dealing with people individually, rather than in a group. Doesn't mean I don't like people.
But you... you're my sunshine. I am so perfectly comfortable around you that sometimes, family members have been shocked at how open I am with you.
And that's the thing - I can't not be open with you. I want to tell you everything because you're the one person I know who'll understand. That and I know you care about what I have to say.
Right now, at 2:30 AM, we are currently two days {!!!} away from our anniversary. I don't think I have to remind you about how stoked I am. But it's not about the presents you've been threatening me with or the fact that you're amazing at surprises - I'm just happy to have you to myself for a whole day.
I'm sure you know that by now. But your presence is so fantastic.
For example. Sometimes, someone will say something funny, but I find it a little difficult to laugh out loud. It maybe takes a pretty good joke to get me to actually laugh out loud. But I find you so hilarious. You just shock me with how many amusing things you have to say.
I love it, because I really do love to laugh. I have a goofy laugh, and maybe that's part of the reason why I keep it hidden.
You definitely know how to make me laugh, though. I appreciate that tons.
Your smile, too. And your eyes. They sparkle {in a good way} when you laugh. I like to make you laugh too. And I know I've done well when you slap your knee. It's great.
Ugh, marrying you is going to be so perfect. You're so cute when we talk about that as well. Once, I wanted you to envision our wedding day and you told me to stop because you were going to cry just thinking about it. {Again, in a good way, I presume...? Kidding.}
Our whole relationship is based off of making each other smile. I've never seen you cry, but as much as I say I want to see that... well if I really think about you crying, I don't actually want that to happen.
So. September 28th, 2014. You and me. It won't matter where we go because it'll be wonderful and romantic and I won't have one worry in my mind.
I'll hold your hand and go wherever you go, because I'm madly in love with you. You are an incredible man. Your heart is so big and you are so good to everyone you meet. Even if you don't like them, you manage to put on a handsome smile and make things work. {And don't worry, I'll always be here to lend an ear when you have stories about crazy people.}
I can't thank you enough for how you've impacted me and keep my world going. I love you so much, BDM.
yours,
m.g.e.
Wednesday, September 24, 2014
natural
There's been a few times you've seen me without makeup.
Tonight was one of those times. I was doing biology all day and ended up looking like a hobo, and you came to surprise me with your wonderful presence.
Of course, you looked handsome. That cologne... dressed all nice, too. Gotta love a man who can rock a beanie and loves to wear ties. I'm a fan.
Then there was me. Wearing oversized sweatpants {NOT the cute kind}, a plain v-neck, hair unwashed {yikes} and in a ridiculous bun, eyebrows undone {hashtag blonde problems}... Just not the best I've looked. I even ran to the bathroom to draw on those eyebrows. Pathetic, I know.
But you stopped me.
There's something about you that actually likes when I go natural. You like when I wear dresses and get all fancied up... but you also like natural. Which I find a little shocking, because hobo me isn't always a nice sight.
You always tell me I'm beautiful, and I usually laugh a little and say thanks. Laughing because I'm kinda self conscious.
You've seen me at my worst, and you still love me. I'll never take that for granted. I can be comfortable without wearing makeup or putting on a cute dress because I know you like me for me.
Never thought I'd be that comfortable around someone.
I love that I can be myself around you, and I know I've said that before, but it's so true. Tonight, you came over because you were in the area and you wanted to see me. Just - that. Even that is just so wonderful to me.
I know that I don't have to hide {physical} aspects of me from you, a) because I don't need to, and b) because you love that I don't.
You're the guy that other girls dream about. "I want someone who tells me I'm beautiful when I have no makeup on", "I want a guy who thinks I look good even when I'm wearing sweatpants", or even "I want a guy who isn't afraid to show me off to his friends".
Oh, you're good. You do it all, even though I feel like I really don't deserve someone as amazing as you. But there you are.
So I'll try not to be so scared of showing you the "hobo" side of me. I know I can trust you to love me no matter what. I mean, I want to impress you always, but it's such a relief knowing that you like me natural just as much as fancy.
You're such a catch. I'm incredibly blessed to have you.
I love you. So does hobo me.
yours,
m.g.e
p.s. THREE DAYS!
Tonight was one of those times. I was doing biology all day and ended up looking like a hobo, and you came to surprise me with your wonderful presence.
Of course, you looked handsome. That cologne... dressed all nice, too. Gotta love a man who can rock a beanie and loves to wear ties. I'm a fan.
Then there was me. Wearing oversized sweatpants {NOT the cute kind}, a plain v-neck, hair unwashed {yikes} and in a ridiculous bun, eyebrows undone {hashtag blonde problems}... Just not the best I've looked. I even ran to the bathroom to draw on those eyebrows. Pathetic, I know.
But you stopped me.
There's something about you that actually likes when I go natural. You like when I wear dresses and get all fancied up... but you also like natural. Which I find a little shocking, because hobo me isn't always a nice sight.
You always tell me I'm beautiful, and I usually laugh a little and say thanks. Laughing because I'm kinda self conscious.
You've seen me at my worst, and you still love me. I'll never take that for granted. I can be comfortable without wearing makeup or putting on a cute dress because I know you like me for me.
Never thought I'd be that comfortable around someone.
I love that I can be myself around you, and I know I've said that before, but it's so true. Tonight, you came over because you were in the area and you wanted to see me. Just - that. Even that is just so wonderful to me.
I know that I don't have to hide {physical} aspects of me from you, a) because I don't need to, and b) because you love that I don't.
You're the guy that other girls dream about. "I want someone who tells me I'm beautiful when I have no makeup on", "I want a guy who thinks I look good even when I'm wearing sweatpants", or even "I want a guy who isn't afraid to show me off to his friends".
Oh, you're good. You do it all, even though I feel like I really don't deserve someone as amazing as you. But there you are.
So I'll try not to be so scared of showing you the "hobo" side of me. I know I can trust you to love me no matter what. I mean, I want to impress you always, but it's such a relief knowing that you like me natural just as much as fancy.
You're such a catch. I'm incredibly blessed to have you.
I love you. So does hobo me.
yours,
m.g.e
p.s. THREE DAYS!
hype
Ahhh. Sweetheart. Four days left. I am SO excited to celebrate our anniversary. I mean, we have multiple years ahead of us and our wedding someday, but I don't think the excitement will ever lessen.
You get to see this whole blog {probably} on Saturday night, the day before our event-filled anniversary. So let's get nostalgic.
Remember when you and I barely talked? We were in multiple science classes together in high school. But we never talked. I never could forget the one day you laughed at a stupid joke I made in Marine Biology. I legitimately couldn't let it go.
You were always that guy I didn't fawn after, only because I couldn't even fathom you actually liking me back. {Unfortunately, I didn't realize how wrong I was. More on that later.} I talked to my sister about you, asking the what-ifs, but I just imagined that you were in a completely different world than me {aka, more mature and popular}.
There was that one time at prom that I went with someone I shouldn't have gone with. It was your senior prom, and you were having fun with your friends. Our only interaction was "Brandon! Dance with my best friend!" And you nodded, apparently terrified that I hated you and was angrily yelling at you to dance with her. {You were wrong there though because I always liked you as a person.}
I found out later on from your sister that you wanted to take someone to prom that year, but she already had a date. I eventually went to Facebook and tried to determine who this special girl was. I would find out later, to my surprise, that you wanted to ask me. What an irony.
Our only interaction after that was really through church. You would sit several pews behind me, with your hand practically covering your face. You did not look entertained. I almost had a game to see how fast you'd race out of church once the service ended. Sometimes I could barely turn around before you'd disappear. Ninja.
I developed a little crush on you. We never talked, but you were so adorable, and every time we passed the street bearing your name, I always thought of you. I didn't know why, but it would prove significant.
Then we started working together. When I found out I got the job, I asked my older sister if you still worked there. And then began the waiting game.
We became friends after I wooed you with my amazing solitaire skills. Then Facebook, then texting... and the rest is history. It might seem like our story came together kind of fast.
But there were long periods of unsure-ness or even you being unaware of my existence. {Jokes.} At one point, I was informed that you were in love with someone else. Oh how that tore me apart. I was... pretty used to rejection. I was almost just angry that it happened again.
And yet, it didn't stop me. Because the way we interacted... it gave me hope. I wasn't sure that you didn't like me back, and that's all I needed to know.
At one point, we went to a movie together {{{{{as friends, wink wink}}}}}. I conveniently "forgot" to bring a jacket, and you conveniently "brought an extra hoodie". {So sly.} I remember whispering silly jokes to you and trying to hide my inner fat kid by not eating all the popcorn.
We sat so close together. The arm rest was between us, but lordy. I was so conscious of your manly arm resting against mine the whole time. When you moved, my world would slightly diminish and, oh, is the movie still going?
Then there was the time we visited the mall together. I wanted to hold your hand so bad. I then rejected food again, but I lusted over your pizza. Promise. Eating in front of people wasn't my thing. Not unless I was comfortable with them. {Now, obviously, I am.}
And then that first date. September 28th. Gosh. We knew at that point that we were in love with each other. You wanted to make the first date special, though. So I went to a zoo event that you claimed you couldn't attend due to school.
But you freakin' showed up. You texted me, we met at a tiger statue {my heart POUNDING}, and you gave me this tight hug that made my knees weak. You took me to a beautiful part of town, we ate ice cream together, and you brought me back to your house. There, you made me wait outside so when I came in, there was rose petals on the floor, and you were there, ready to dance with me. {Dancing's actually kind of our thing, isn't it!}
The night you asked me officially to be your girlfriend was October 25th. {We count the 28th as our anniversary though. There wasn't a doubt that we would be together.} You took me on a walk through my neighborhood, and led me to the beautiful pond with a fountain.
You actually got on one knee to ask me to be official, which I thought was a lovely touch. You even gave me an eloquent speech when you said "I love you" in person, foreal foreal.
Just thinking of all these amazing times, along with the other moments that I haven't even included... Gee.
I am so blessed. You are a wonderful, fantastic, exciting, romantic, perfect gentleman, and I thank God for you every night.
We've had such a magnificent two years, and along with that, knowing you since practically middle school is so crazy awesome. I'll save this for another post, but not only do I know how perfect we are together, but even everyone else knows it. I am so happy to be with you, love.
I love you, je t'aime, te amo, ich liebe dich... none of it can express how much I actually love you.
yours,
m.g.e.
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
that one obsession
You know that one obsession I have? {Cough cough Pinterest cough.} Of course you do. Because I'm always talking about things I've seen on there. May or may not have encouraged you to get your own Pinterest as well. {You're such a good man.}
You also know how obsessed I am with planning our future wedding on there. To be fair, I started pinning wedding things long before we became an item. I'm a romantic, just like you. I just express this in odd ways - namely, the internet...?
Anyway. I like to plan our wedding because thinking about that special day is so exciting for me. I don't know when it'll happen, but the fact that it will happen means the world to me.
Well, sometimes I just can't help smiling at those wedding pins. Thinking about us as the bride and groom, having the flowers and colors we like, our close friends and family nearby, and just an overall lovely atmosphere... it's exceedingly, perfectly wonderful.
Of course, I'm more excited to just be married to you. The marriage life will suit us well, I have no doubt. We fit together so well. We'll learn to cook better together, I'll clean the bathroom {because my hair will be everywhere, no matter how hard I try to contain it}, you'll take out the trash {because you even do that at my house}, we'll watch our favorite shows together, and the cuddling...
Man, the cuddling. I cannot wait for unlimited cuddling, let me tell you. It is inhumane to keep someone as comfortable as you away from someone as nocturnal as me. I find it incredibly hard to fall asleep at night. Not even sure where it came from. But when I'm with you? I get so comfortable and warm that sleep isn't a problem.
Well. Sometimes it still is a problem, because my brain goes, "He's HERE! You're EXCITED! STAY AWAKEEEEEE!" And my body goes, "¡OKAY!" But that's okay too.
So yes, I avidly plan our wedding. As do you. Because neither of us can wait to be together. Can I also mention how adorable it is that you agreed to a Pinterest account because you wanted to see my original wedding board? And now look: we have our own private wedding board so I can pin freely without showing my ideas to the world.
For the record, I know that not all planning ends up that way when the actual wedding comes, but the best part is that no matter what, we'll be planning it together. We won't have to worry about any opinion other than ours. Also yes, I fully plan on letting you have a say in the decorations and everything.
Because our relationship is give and take. We do things together, since our whole relationship is about togetherness.
Speaking of which, I get to see you tomorrow, so while I could go on and on {and on and on} about our bright, magnificent future and wedding plans... sleep calls. I'm sure you get the point: I am so in love with you and I love our past and our present, and I already love our future. Oh, and can you guess what else? I love you.
yours,
m.g.e.
You also know how obsessed I am with planning our future wedding on there. To be fair, I started pinning wedding things long before we became an item. I'm a romantic, just like you. I just express this in odd ways - namely, the internet...?
Anyway. I like to plan our wedding because thinking about that special day is so exciting for me. I don't know when it'll happen, but the fact that it will happen means the world to me.
Well, sometimes I just can't help smiling at those wedding pins. Thinking about us as the bride and groom, having the flowers and colors we like, our close friends and family nearby, and just an overall lovely atmosphere... it's exceedingly, perfectly wonderful.
Of course, I'm more excited to just be married to you. The marriage life will suit us well, I have no doubt. We fit together so well. We'll learn to cook better together, I'll clean the bathroom {because my hair will be everywhere, no matter how hard I try to contain it}, you'll take out the trash {because you even do that at my house}, we'll watch our favorite shows together, and the cuddling...
Man, the cuddling. I cannot wait for unlimited cuddling, let me tell you. It is inhumane to keep someone as comfortable as you away from someone as nocturnal as me. I find it incredibly hard to fall asleep at night. Not even sure where it came from. But when I'm with you? I get so comfortable and warm that sleep isn't a problem.
Well. Sometimes it still is a problem, because my brain goes, "He's HERE! You're EXCITED! STAY AWAKEEEEEE!" And my body goes, "¡OKAY!" But that's okay too.
So yes, I avidly plan our wedding. As do you. Because neither of us can wait to be together. Can I also mention how adorable it is that you agreed to a Pinterest account because you wanted to see my original wedding board? And now look: we have our own private wedding board so I can pin freely without showing my ideas to the world.
For the record, I know that not all planning ends up that way when the actual wedding comes, but the best part is that no matter what, we'll be planning it together. We won't have to worry about any opinion other than ours. Also yes, I fully plan on letting you have a say in the decorations and everything.
Because our relationship is give and take. We do things together, since our whole relationship is about togetherness.
Speaking of which, I get to see you tomorrow, so while I could go on and on {and on and on} about our bright, magnificent future and wedding plans... sleep calls. I'm sure you get the point: I am so in love with you and I love our past and our present, and I already love our future. Oh, and can you guess what else? I love you.
yours,
m.g.e.
Sunday, September 21, 2014
what a romantic
Something that I find really adorable about you is the fact that you love to make grand romantic gestures. It's never something I'd have expected to happen until our first Christmas together.
I'm fairly certain your love language is gift giving, and boy. You just go above and beyond anything I could ask for. It's so sweet, seriously. And you know me so well that I'm constantly taken back by how well you listen to me.
You're not afraid to go shopping for girly things like makeup or dresses, and you listen to the silly movies I talk about or the colors I'm currently obsessed with.
And I know that this upcoming anniversary, you're going to stress yourself out {like before} trying to make every detail perfect. I won't ever believe it's less than perfect, because the most important part is that we're celebrating time together and how in love we are. But I have to admit, it's pretty stinkin' cute that you put all the effort into it. Next year, maybe I'll do the surprising.
And even though I badger you, I also really do like the surprises. {There, I said it.} It drives me crazy not knowing, because I can never keep secrets from you. I even showed you a glimpse of this blog, so who knows - you could be reading this right now. {If you are, you're grounded.} ;) No, but I trust you.
I'm just itching for this week to be over so I can spend the day with you. Of course, this whole week, we have separate schedules. But nothing will stop me from having an amazing time with you on Sunday.
I have my form of coping, though. I'll just be writing about my love for you, right here. And I'll see you in a couple days, because I expressed that I couldn't go a whole week without seeing you - so we'll watch New Girl and make waffles {my favorite <3} and cuddle because 2 years or 1 year and 51 weeks... every day is special to me.
And I have business to do, mind you. You and I both know well that I'm a chameleon when it comes to hair {yikes, but what can you do?}. I'll just consider it a week of preparing myself to have a wonderful, you-filled day.
I don't know, this post seems all over the place. But the title speaks the truth: you are a wonderful romantic, and I adore it. I love you so much. 6 days!
yours,
m.g.e.
I'm fairly certain your love language is gift giving, and boy. You just go above and beyond anything I could ask for. It's so sweet, seriously. And you know me so well that I'm constantly taken back by how well you listen to me.
You're not afraid to go shopping for girly things like makeup or dresses, and you listen to the silly movies I talk about or the colors I'm currently obsessed with.
And I know that this upcoming anniversary, you're going to stress yourself out {like before} trying to make every detail perfect. I won't ever believe it's less than perfect, because the most important part is that we're celebrating time together and how in love we are. But I have to admit, it's pretty stinkin' cute that you put all the effort into it. Next year, maybe I'll do the surprising.
And even though I badger you, I also really do like the surprises. {There, I said it.} It drives me crazy not knowing, because I can never keep secrets from you. I even showed you a glimpse of this blog, so who knows - you could be reading this right now. {If you are, you're grounded.} ;) No, but I trust you.
I'm just itching for this week to be over so I can spend the day with you. Of course, this whole week, we have separate schedules. But nothing will stop me from having an amazing time with you on Sunday.
I have my form of coping, though. I'll just be writing about my love for you, right here. And I'll see you in a couple days, because I expressed that I couldn't go a whole week without seeing you - so we'll watch New Girl and make waffles {my favorite <3} and cuddle because 2 years or 1 year and 51 weeks... every day is special to me.
And I have business to do, mind you. You and I both know well that I'm a chameleon when it comes to hair {yikes, but what can you do?}. I'll just consider it a week of preparing myself to have a wonderful, you-filled day.
I don't know, this post seems all over the place. But the title speaks the truth: you are a wonderful romantic, and I adore it. I love you so much. 6 days!
yours,
m.g.e.
Saturday, September 20, 2014
one week
I can't lie. I'm ridiculously excited. We celebrate our second year together in one week. I can't believe how quickly time has passed.
Last year, you were incredible. You surprised me by taking me to the zoo to get inside a cage with kangaroos and throw peanuts in their general direction {because they wanted nothing to do with us}.
Then you drove me to North Carolina {my dream state} to visit a small aquarium, because you know I love marine animals. Especially jellyfish.
And then we moved to sit on the beach and have a romantic picnic. I'll never forget how beautiful everything was. Half of the sky was gorgeous hues of blue, purple, and pink, and the other half had a storm brewing. But it was the most incredible storm I'd ever witnessed.
Before the clouds rolled in too far, you turned me around, held my hands, and made sure I knew what you were about to say wasn't a proposal. {We both wanted to, but the timing hasn't been right so far, and that's okay, because it's all God's time.}
You are so good with your words. You just delivered this eloquent speech, just like you did when you asked me to be your girlfriend, and just like you did over two years ago when you told me you were in love with me. I was practically in the clouds, so unfortunately, I can't recite word for word what you said. But it was so romantic and beautiful.
Then, you pulled out this gorgeous promise ring and right there, we promised to each other that we would be together forever - that we're soulmates. It's funny to think back on this moment, where a wedding party had been further down along the beach. A couple asked us if we had just gotten engaged. It sure felt like it. You have this way of making everything you do being the most charismatic, incredible experience of my life.
On the way home, I shut my eyes for a bit because I was tired, but soon I realized you were slowing the car down. I figured you needed gas, but we were turning into a large parking lot. It was extremely dark outside and it was spitting rain, but you parked under one of the street lights and played our song.
You came over, let me out of the car, and we danced to "Inevitable".
The song that we had our first dance to. That first dance had been at your brother's wedding. I'd been trying to get your attention all night, so you would dance with me, but you were busy being the best man, and my stomach did somersaults whenever you'd come nearby, so I'd get shy.
At one point, I noticed you standing at the DJ table, picking out a song. "Inevitable" came on, and you made a straight line for me, with your hand held out. We walked to the dance floor {my heart was pounding and my friends and sisters were going crazy}, where we swayed and talked.
I did not want that dance to end. But it did, and you had to leave, as your best friend gave you a cheeky smile and teased you to stay for another dance. He knew we were totally infatuated with each other. And boy, was I walking on sunshine for the rest of the night. I didn't even know what to do with myself. My sister had to beg my parents to stay that long at the wedding, because she knew we needed to have our little moment.
And I'm so glad we did.
Because fast forward a little over one year, as we were dancing in the parking lot, and I looked into your eyes without that shyness {good thing that's gone}, my heart just swelled.
{Want to know irony? As I've been writing part of this, "Marry Me" came on Pandora. Perfect.}
So look at where we are now. Two years into our relationship, and I am so happy. I know I don't show it all the time, because life gets in the way, and I'll have my complaints about it.
But I have no complaints about you. Because I'll think of you and that perfect love that we have... and everything is right again.
I can't wait for a week from now, because it's just going to be you and me, and we'll forget all the problems of the world. I don't know when we'll get married, but whether that's a year, five years, or a decade from now - I'm happy just knowing that I get to spend eternity with you either way.
One week. Seven days. What we're doing is a mystery to me as of yet, because you like to keep surprises. And I know it'll be perfect, no matter what we do, or where we go, because I'll be with you.
And gosh, am I so overjoyed that I'm with you. I love you so much, sweetheart. Happy 1 year and 51 weeks.
yours,
m.g.e
Last year, you were incredible. You surprised me by taking me to the zoo to get inside a cage with kangaroos and throw peanuts in their general direction {because they wanted nothing to do with us}.
Then you drove me to North Carolina {my dream state} to visit a small aquarium, because you know I love marine animals. Especially jellyfish.
And then we moved to sit on the beach and have a romantic picnic. I'll never forget how beautiful everything was. Half of the sky was gorgeous hues of blue, purple, and pink, and the other half had a storm brewing. But it was the most incredible storm I'd ever witnessed.
Before the clouds rolled in too far, you turned me around, held my hands, and made sure I knew what you were about to say wasn't a proposal. {We both wanted to, but the timing hasn't been right so far, and that's okay, because it's all God's time.}
You are so good with your words. You just delivered this eloquent speech, just like you did when you asked me to be your girlfriend, and just like you did over two years ago when you told me you were in love with me. I was practically in the clouds, so unfortunately, I can't recite word for word what you said. But it was so romantic and beautiful.
Then, you pulled out this gorgeous promise ring and right there, we promised to each other that we would be together forever - that we're soulmates. It's funny to think back on this moment, where a wedding party had been further down along the beach. A couple asked us if we had just gotten engaged. It sure felt like it. You have this way of making everything you do being the most charismatic, incredible experience of my life.
On the way home, I shut my eyes for a bit because I was tired, but soon I realized you were slowing the car down. I figured you needed gas, but we were turning into a large parking lot. It was extremely dark outside and it was spitting rain, but you parked under one of the street lights and played our song.
You came over, let me out of the car, and we danced to "Inevitable".
The song that we had our first dance to. That first dance had been at your brother's wedding. I'd been trying to get your attention all night, so you would dance with me, but you were busy being the best man, and my stomach did somersaults whenever you'd come nearby, so I'd get shy.
At one point, I noticed you standing at the DJ table, picking out a song. "Inevitable" came on, and you made a straight line for me, with your hand held out. We walked to the dance floor {my heart was pounding and my friends and sisters were going crazy}, where we swayed and talked.
I did not want that dance to end. But it did, and you had to leave, as your best friend gave you a cheeky smile and teased you to stay for another dance. He knew we were totally infatuated with each other. And boy, was I walking on sunshine for the rest of the night. I didn't even know what to do with myself. My sister had to beg my parents to stay that long at the wedding, because she knew we needed to have our little moment.
And I'm so glad we did.
Because fast forward a little over one year, as we were dancing in the parking lot, and I looked into your eyes without that shyness {good thing that's gone}, my heart just swelled.
{Want to know irony? As I've been writing part of this, "Marry Me" came on Pandora. Perfect.}
So look at where we are now. Two years into our relationship, and I am so happy. I know I don't show it all the time, because life gets in the way, and I'll have my complaints about it.
But I have no complaints about you. Because I'll think of you and that perfect love that we have... and everything is right again.
I can't wait for a week from now, because it's just going to be you and me, and we'll forget all the problems of the world. I don't know when we'll get married, but whether that's a year, five years, or a decade from now - I'm happy just knowing that I get to spend eternity with you either way.
One week. Seven days. What we're doing is a mystery to me as of yet, because you like to keep surprises. And I know it'll be perfect, no matter what we do, or where we go, because I'll be with you.
And gosh, am I so overjoyed that I'm with you. I love you so much, sweetheart. Happy 1 year and 51 weeks.
yours,
m.g.e
not over it
We were once warned that we were in the "honeymoon" phase of dating. This occurs around the first year, and it basically implies that all things are new and lovey-dovey, but eventually, you'll get used to one another and fall into a comfortable apathy.
Maybe I'm stubborn. But we're approaching our second year, and I couldn't be more infatuated with you.
The other night, I noticed that my hair smelled nice. {Sorry. It's kind of really such a girl thing to do.} So I asked what it smelled like to you.
You took a whiff and just shook your head and said in this genuine tone, "Like an angel." I thought you were joking, so I waited to see if you were going to make a face. But you didn't, so my heart grew about 3 sizes.
Then there's times where I notice how much I crave holding your hand or kissing your perfect lips. I have this thing where I always need to be touching you, whether it's snuggling up with you or resting my hand on your leg or holding your hand {one of my personal favorites}. I just love the nearness of you.
But those kisses. Wow. Embarrassing story time - during the beginning of our relationship, you kissed me multiple times, but I was terrified of kissing. I guess I was afraid I'd be a bad kisser or something. Maybe it was just something new I had to adjust to. You were, after all, my first kiss {and I, yours}. But when I got over that little problem... my whole world expanded.
And now I cherish every single kiss. Enough that there's no way I have any qualms about PDA. I am the PDA queen. Mainly with hugs, but I'll accept any form of affection.
I'm just labeling myself as someone whose love language is physical touch. But I'm a-okay with that.
On top of all this wonderfulness, I can't get enough of you. I love spending time with you and every time we have to say goodbye, I get a little sad, because it's like watching the sun go down on the horizon: you know it's still there, but not where you want it to be.
There's these little things you do too. Little, but so significant. Like how you make a point to open the car door for me every time we're driving anywhere. Or how you actually prefer to pay for dates. It's stuff I would never require from you, and if you wanted things to change, I'd definitely accept, but you still do it because you want to. You're such a gentleman.
We don't always have perfect days. Sometimes we may argue or get irritable. And I can admit, it's my fault 90% of the time. But there have been very few times during these less-than-happy times where you didn't tell me you loved me and kissed me goodnight.
I don't need to go into the times where I'm just a brat. I can be plain stupid. You are probably welllllllll aware of that, unfortunately. But I'm thankful for your patience and kind heart. I don't know how I still deserve you, but you still love me and I would never wish otherwise.
And when I'm being stubborn, and you tilt my chin up to look into your eyes... well you know that makes me melt. You've got me completely under your spell.
So no, I don't believe in the "honeymoon phase". If it exists, we must be on an eternal honeymoon - something I'm completely okay with. {Roadtrip ideaaa.}
I'm infatuated with everything about you. And I love you so much - that's never going away.
yours,
m.g.e.
Maybe I'm stubborn. But we're approaching our second year, and I couldn't be more infatuated with you.
The other night, I noticed that my hair smelled nice. {Sorry. It's kind of really such a girl thing to do.} So I asked what it smelled like to you.
You took a whiff and just shook your head and said in this genuine tone, "Like an angel." I thought you were joking, so I waited to see if you were going to make a face. But you didn't, so my heart grew about 3 sizes.
Then there's times where I notice how much I crave holding your hand or kissing your perfect lips. I have this thing where I always need to be touching you, whether it's snuggling up with you or resting my hand on your leg or holding your hand {one of my personal favorites}. I just love the nearness of you.
But those kisses. Wow. Embarrassing story time - during the beginning of our relationship, you kissed me multiple times, but I was terrified of kissing. I guess I was afraid I'd be a bad kisser or something. Maybe it was just something new I had to adjust to. You were, after all, my first kiss {and I, yours}. But when I got over that little problem... my whole world expanded.
And now I cherish every single kiss. Enough that there's no way I have any qualms about PDA. I am the PDA queen. Mainly with hugs, but I'll accept any form of affection.
I'm just labeling myself as someone whose love language is physical touch. But I'm a-okay with that.
On top of all this wonderfulness, I can't get enough of you. I love spending time with you and every time we have to say goodbye, I get a little sad, because it's like watching the sun go down on the horizon: you know it's still there, but not where you want it to be.
There's these little things you do too. Little, but so significant. Like how you make a point to open the car door for me every time we're driving anywhere. Or how you actually prefer to pay for dates. It's stuff I would never require from you, and if you wanted things to change, I'd definitely accept, but you still do it because you want to. You're such a gentleman.
We don't always have perfect days. Sometimes we may argue or get irritable. And I can admit, it's my fault 90% of the time. But there have been very few times during these less-than-happy times where you didn't tell me you loved me and kissed me goodnight.
I don't need to go into the times where I'm just a brat. I can be plain stupid. You are probably welllllllll aware of that, unfortunately. But I'm thankful for your patience and kind heart. I don't know how I still deserve you, but you still love me and I would never wish otherwise.
And when I'm being stubborn, and you tilt my chin up to look into your eyes... well you know that makes me melt. You've got me completely under your spell.
So no, I don't believe in the "honeymoon phase". If it exists, we must be on an eternal honeymoon - something I'm completely okay with. {Roadtrip ideaaa.}
I'm infatuated with everything about you. And I love you so much - that's never going away.
yours,
m.g.e.
Friday, September 19, 2014
taking care
I hope you know, my love, that I will always take care of you. Whether you're feeling sick, or sad, or angry, or anything else you can think of. I'm never going to get tired of making sure you're happy and healthy.
I know it can be an extreme shot to the pride when you have to let your guard down and show that you're human. I mean, it being possible for you to get sick is so shocking that sometimes I'm a little blown away {sarcasmmm}, but I don't mind.
And it's ironic, because about a week ago, we planned on spending an evening together, and of course, I came down with an extremely painful migraine. The kind where I can't be in any kind of light, noises make me cringe, and all I want to do is curl up into a ball as I hide under a blanket.
Instead of just peacing out {which I wouldn't have blamed you for}, you sat down with me, we cuddled up, and you turned on the TV without sound on. I appreciate that so much, by the way. You waited the pain out with me, trying to make me as comfortable as possible. And you'd do it again, without fail.
You are such a comfort for me. AND, speaking of which, you totally soothed my migraine away. You were, and are, incredibly considerate. I know that I can be around you and be safe. Safe from migraines, safe from the craziness around me, and safe to let my own guard down, even if, in retrospect, it sounds pathetic to remember that I literally hid under a blanket from a migraine for roughly 2 hours. But you were with me the whole time.
That's how I want you to feel about me. I want you to know that whenever you're feeling bad, you can count on me. I won't leave your side, and when sickness changes our plans, I could never blame you for it. {Because that would be SILLY.}
All I want is for you to be okay and to see that smile back on your face. When you're feeling bad, you always mention that I probably think you look unattractive. While I don't find your sickness in any remote way good {because I'd rather you be healthy and not upset}, you couldn't be more wrong about it.
You and I have both seen each other at our best and worst. {Well, at least you have. You've definitely seen me at my worst.} And you know what? I will always be attracted to you, sickness or not. So you make that point clear in your head, mister.
Additionally, there are never "ruined plans". We can plan all we want, and it'll be fantastic, but the most joy I get is merely when I'm with you. Doesn't matter what we're doing. {Although if someone sat us in a room, tied us up in chairs, and played Twilight on an infinite loop... yeah then you could say neither of us would be enjoying ourselves. Yikes.}
But the point is. I AM ALWAYS HERE FOR YOU. See, I put that in all capitals because it's something I'd probably yell at you when you tell me "I'm sorry I'm so boring tonight because I worked all day and have a migraine" or "I'm sorry I'm sick and we didn't get to watch an episode of a show that won't magically disappear if we don't watch it tonight".
Because you are not allowed to apologize for any of that. You are the love of my life and any time with you, whether it's some fun outing or a date night in or a night where one of us is sick and needs taking care of you - all of it is time I cherish. It's all a part of the life that I'm going to accept when we get married. I can't physically be there for you all the time, but I can sure as heck try. {And of course I'll always be there emotionally/mentally/in-love-ly.}
I love you so much.
yours,
m.g.e.
Thursday, September 18, 2014
oh, you.
You know, I've known this for a long time, but tonight, I was looking back on old pictures in my phone... and let me just say.
You are so stinkin' adorable. I have pictures all the way back from December of 2012, back when we had been dating for 3 months. I just can't not smile at the pictures of you. {Sidenote: I honestly feel as if both of us have lost an incredible amount of weight. Weird, because I was under the impression that couples generally gain weight. Whoopsies.}
But real talk.
I've raved about your stunning blue eyes before, so I don't think I need to cover that again. {Unless you want me to because I WILL.} But then you've got the cutest smile and the most handsome profile and freckles that I could stare at for days...
And you might hate this, but you've also got that incredible birthmark on your hand and I think it's so cool and unique.
Back to freckles, because I'm not done with that. You are a very freckled man and I just adore it. They're not super noticeable unless you look close, and because I like to stare at your muscular arms {whoops again}, I'm just fascinated.
And you've got this smile. I've captured it on camera many times. It's one of those adorable smiles where you're not posing for the camera - you're mainly looking past the camera at me, and your eyes are smiling too. It's a tiny smile, because you don't show your teeth, but it's so precious because I know it's genuine.
You know how you can tell a genuine smile from the way your eyes look when you do? Well this smile is more like a fleeting moment where you're focused on me and I swear, it tells stories.
Then there's the kisses. {PG rated part here, kids.} You're literally like a dashing gentleman right out of a romantic movie. You do that thing where you gently have your hand on my cheek and I think that's so endearing. All I'll say - you are a wonderful kisser.
I know I don't deserve you because you're right out of my dreams, but I'm so glad I have you. You're perfect and adorable and I wouldn't change one thing about you. I love you very, very much.
yours,
m.g.e.
You are so stinkin' adorable. I have pictures all the way back from December of 2012, back when we had been dating for 3 months. I just can't not smile at the pictures of you. {Sidenote: I honestly feel as if both of us have lost an incredible amount of weight. Weird, because I was under the impression that couples generally gain weight. Whoopsies.}
But real talk.
I've raved about your stunning blue eyes before, so I don't think I need to cover that again. {Unless you want me to because I WILL.} But then you've got the cutest smile and the most handsome profile and freckles that I could stare at for days...
And you might hate this, but you've also got that incredible birthmark on your hand and I think it's so cool and unique.
Back to freckles, because I'm not done with that. You are a very freckled man and I just adore it. They're not super noticeable unless you look close, and because I like to stare at your muscular arms {whoops again}, I'm just fascinated.
And you've got this smile. I've captured it on camera many times. It's one of those adorable smiles where you're not posing for the camera - you're mainly looking past the camera at me, and your eyes are smiling too. It's a tiny smile, because you don't show your teeth, but it's so precious because I know it's genuine.
You know how you can tell a genuine smile from the way your eyes look when you do? Well this smile is more like a fleeting moment where you're focused on me and I swear, it tells stories.
Then there's the kisses. {PG rated part here, kids.} You're literally like a dashing gentleman right out of a romantic movie. You do that thing where you gently have your hand on my cheek and I think that's so endearing. All I'll say - you are a wonderful kisser.
I know I don't deserve you because you're right out of my dreams, but I'm so glad I have you. You're perfect and adorable and I wouldn't change one thing about you. I love you very, very much.
yours,
m.g.e.
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
chill and stuff
Today, I was extremely busy. Not only is my sleeping schedule messed up, but recently, during the beginning of the week I've been working until 9-10 at night. Not fun.
So we had to cancel plans. You didn't complain. You didn't shame me over anything. You said "okay, I'll just find something else to do". Yes, I wanted to hang out with you {SO BAD}, but the fact that you just let me figure my busy-ness out... it was so gracious.
Our relationship is so easy, sometimes I have to remind myself that this isn't just a miraculous dream. You're so chill and easygoing. I guess it helps that you have like, five thousand friends too.
Which is another thing. I do get a little possessive about spending time with you because I love it, but I would never tell you to turn down plans with friends because of me.
Yet, you always make time for me. So much so that I feel like I owe you a week with your friends. But you never complain, and you like time with me? Talk about a Prince Charming.
It works out splendidly. You understand my need to focus on the little things, and I understand your need to focus on the big picture. {Aka, school versus adult job.} You help me study, I help you look for job opportunities. It's pretty swell.
And the whole thing is, you're my best friend. Understanding each other just comes as a package deal with being in love.
I'll never stop getting excited to see you when I can. {One day, that'll be every day. Yes.} I was asking you recently what you wanted to do on a night we were hanging out, and you replied that it didn't matter to you because it's always perfect just because we're together. How romantic and true.
I'd just like to point out that you've changed so much in me. I used to be so nervous to talk to you. I had no idea what to say, and my desperate attempts at trying to make you laugh seemed feeble. But for some reason, you had an interest in me. Boy, was I lucky. I was worried that one day my humor was going to make you stand up and calmly but quickly exit the room.
Then there was that one fateful night where I called you to tell you how much I liked you. The real kind of like. I mean, I'd pretty much decided that I was in love with you already, but that was a little strong. I'd let you make that move first. {Sorry.}
My palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms heavy... {I'm sure you get the point so you keep on rapping Eminem and get back to this when you're done.}
But really.
I was so timid back then, even though I'd like to think that I was a lot more bold than I thought I could ever be. But you brought me into this perfect comfort zone, and just like the title of this...
It was all chill and stuff.
I love you, toots.
yours,
m.g.e.
So we had to cancel plans. You didn't complain. You didn't shame me over anything. You said "okay, I'll just find something else to do". Yes, I wanted to hang out with you {SO BAD}, but the fact that you just let me figure my busy-ness out... it was so gracious.
Our relationship is so easy, sometimes I have to remind myself that this isn't just a miraculous dream. You're so chill and easygoing. I guess it helps that you have like, five thousand friends too.
Which is another thing. I do get a little possessive about spending time with you because I love it, but I would never tell you to turn down plans with friends because of me.
Yet, you always make time for me. So much so that I feel like I owe you a week with your friends. But you never complain, and you like time with me? Talk about a Prince Charming.
It works out splendidly. You understand my need to focus on the little things, and I understand your need to focus on the big picture. {Aka, school versus adult job.} You help me study, I help you look for job opportunities. It's pretty swell.
And the whole thing is, you're my best friend. Understanding each other just comes as a package deal with being in love.
I'll never stop getting excited to see you when I can. {One day, that'll be every day. Yes.} I was asking you recently what you wanted to do on a night we were hanging out, and you replied that it didn't matter to you because it's always perfect just because we're together. How romantic and true.
I'd just like to point out that you've changed so much in me. I used to be so nervous to talk to you. I had no idea what to say, and my desperate attempts at trying to make you laugh seemed feeble. But for some reason, you had an interest in me. Boy, was I lucky. I was worried that one day my humor was going to make you stand up and calmly but quickly exit the room.
Then there was that one fateful night where I called you to tell you how much I liked you. The real kind of like. I mean, I'd pretty much decided that I was in love with you already, but that was a little strong. I'd let you make that move first. {
My palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms heavy... {I'm sure you get the point so you keep on rapping Eminem and get back to this when you're done.}
But really.
I was so timid back then, even though I'd like to think that I was a lot more bold than I thought I could ever be. But you brought me into this perfect comfort zone, and just like the title of this...
It was all chill and stuff.
I love you, toots.
yours,
m.g.e.
Tuesday, September 16, 2014
keep your chin up
You know the feeling. Being a college student, and, I imagine, being a college graduate can be incredibly discouraging.
Sometimes life just doesn't go the way you planned, and it's ohsofrustrating. Even worse, sometimes the people in your life are the discouragers, telling you what you can and can't do. Telling you how your life is supposed to go, when you're pretty sure you already know what you want. Know what I mean?
Well I'm here to tell you, dear soulmate, that you are more than capable to do anything you want to do. This is coming from the queen of the stress and discouragement department, so I deeefinitely know what I'm talking about. {Kidding.. but not kidding.}
Sometimes I think you undermine how accomplished you are. You have done so much with your life, and I'm constantly impressed by you. But you're incredible humble about it all, and while that's a good trait, you should still know how amazing you are.
I could go on for hours about you and your accomplishments. Even better, I can go on for days on what an incredible character you have.
I've seen people who have amazing talents that go to waste because they refuse to push themselves any further outside of their comfort zone. But you're constantly striving for better.
You won't stop at anything to get to the goal you know is right for you. I've been shocked {and impressed} at your confidence. You're not one to back down, and I hope that you never lose that part of you.
I hope you'll ever need to come back to this post, but just know: you are amazing. Don't let the crazy people and negativity in the world get to you. I live off of your positive attitude.
I have so much confidence in you because I know that not only will you work for what you want, but I also am convinced that with the amount of work you put into everything, you'll always succeed. And if you can encourage me to continue school, you must know that you're a great example.
I'm so proud of how far you've come {as I've stated before} and I'm even more excited for where you're going in life. Even if there are setbacks, or one of those crazy persons gets in your way, I have no doubt that you'll still manage to impress us all.
By the way, you have an astounding amount of patience for the crazy people you do have to deal with. It's just part of your character. To me, you're like a combination of Superman and Batman. You can do anything, and you're completely legendary when you do it.
You're going to do great things. I'm so excited for you, sweetheart.
I love you much, Superbat. {...new nickname.}
yours,
m.g.e.
Sometimes life just doesn't go the way you planned, and it's ohsofrustrating. Even worse, sometimes the people in your life are the discouragers, telling you what you can and can't do. Telling you how your life is supposed to go, when you're pretty sure you already know what you want. Know what I mean?
Well I'm here to tell you, dear soulmate, that you are more than capable to do anything you want to do. This is coming from the queen of the stress and discouragement department, so I deeefinitely know what I'm talking about. {Kidding.. but not kidding.}
Sometimes I think you undermine how accomplished you are. You have done so much with your life, and I'm constantly impressed by you. But you're incredible humble about it all, and while that's a good trait, you should still know how amazing you are.
I could go on for hours about you and your accomplishments. Even better, I can go on for days on what an incredible character you have.
I've seen people who have amazing talents that go to waste because they refuse to push themselves any further outside of their comfort zone. But you're constantly striving for better.
You won't stop at anything to get to the goal you know is right for you. I've been shocked {and impressed} at your confidence. You're not one to back down, and I hope that you never lose that part of you.
I hope you'll ever need to come back to this post, but just know: you are amazing. Don't let the crazy people and negativity in the world get to you. I live off of your positive attitude.
I have so much confidence in you because I know that not only will you work for what you want, but I also am convinced that with the amount of work you put into everything, you'll always succeed. And if you can encourage me to continue school, you must know that you're a great example.
I'm so proud of how far you've come {as I've stated before} and I'm even more excited for where you're going in life. Even if there are setbacks, or one of those crazy persons gets in your way, I have no doubt that you'll still manage to impress us all.
By the way, you have an astounding amount of patience for the crazy people you do have to deal with. It's just part of your character. To me, you're like a combination of Superman and Batman. You can do anything, and you're completely legendary when you do it.
You're going to do great things. I'm so excited for you, sweetheart.
I love you much, Superbat. {...new nickname.}
yours,
m.g.e.
Monday, September 15, 2014
when you're happy
So, dearest soulmate, this post is to read when you're happy. But seriously - there's so much to be said for when you're happy.
You just... you light up the room when you smile. When you laugh. You and my niece have recently become friends, and you just roll around on the floor, run after her, and treat her like a little princess. I just love that you know how to be genuinely happy and exhibit that through your actions and words.
Sometimes, you just look deep into my eyes and smile, and I can tell that you're so content and happy. It's those moments where I feel like my whole world has pleasantly paused.
I also love when you hear a joke or say something funny, and it tickles you so much that you stretch your head back, say one big "HA!", and slap your knee. Or when you cover your mouth, trying to contain that adorable laugh.
Some days, I'll arrive at your house and you'll just get this big grin on your face, and you'll go, "Oh hey!" and it never gets old. Your hugs too. Those never get old either.
When you're happy, my love, I automatically feel warmth to my core, because I love to see and make you smile.
I've said it before, and I'll say it a million times again: you are the sunshine in my life. Being with you, as opposed to being apart? There's such a difference in my mood. You never fail to make me smile.
So I hope, as you read this, that you really are {or will be} happy, because you deserve to be happy. Never stop shining that positive attitude. It's what makes my life a hundred times brighter.
I love you so much. {And if this gets "Happy" stuck in your head, I'm so sorry.}
yours,
m.g.e.
You just... you light up the room when you smile. When you laugh. You and my niece have recently become friends, and you just roll around on the floor, run after her, and treat her like a little princess. I just love that you know how to be genuinely happy and exhibit that through your actions and words.
Sometimes, you just look deep into my eyes and smile, and I can tell that you're so content and happy. It's those moments where I feel like my whole world has pleasantly paused.
I also love when you hear a joke or say something funny, and it tickles you so much that you stretch your head back, say one big "HA!", and slap your knee. Or when you cover your mouth, trying to contain that adorable laugh.
Some days, I'll arrive at your house and you'll just get this big grin on your face, and you'll go, "Oh hey!" and it never gets old. Your hugs too. Those never get old either.
When you're happy, my love, I automatically feel warmth to my core, because I love to see and make you smile.
I've said it before, and I'll say it a million times again: you are the sunshine in my life. Being with you, as opposed to being apart? There's such a difference in my mood. You never fail to make me smile.
So I hope, as you read this, that you really are {or will be} happy, because you deserve to be happy. Never stop shining that positive attitude. It's what makes my life a hundred times brighter.
I love you so much. {And if this gets "Happy" stuck in your head, I'm so sorry.}
yours,
m.g.e.
Sunday, September 14, 2014
timing
Time to be straightforward {or at least, more so than normal}. Can I just say how much it sucks to have to leave you?
Being with you is a time that I treasure so much. I feel comfortable, I forget all my worries, I laugh more than ever... You just put a smile on my face without fail and it drives me crazy that every night, at some point, I have to leave and go home, where you aren't there.
My biggest complaint, I guess, is that you are home, so leaving you really just means I'm kind of lost.
But anyway. The most important part is that I get to see you, period. You bring me so much joy, and I'm incredibly blessed to have you as my sweetheart. I don't deserve it whatsoever.
And you know, it's not such a bad thing when the only problem I have with you is that you're not with me, right now. But that'll change someday. And I cannot wait for it. I feel like a broken record, because I'm sure you get the point: I love you, I don't see you as often as I would like, and I can't wait to get married so I can spend every night with my best friend.
But I regret nothing. You should know how intense and out-of-this-world my love is for you. You should be reminded every day until you can anticipate the exact words I'm going to say. And even then, I'll still tell you it, because that's how much you mean to me, and that's how much you should know that my feelings for you will never diminish.
So yes, waiting can suck a lot. But you're worth it. For the amount of positivity and light you've shed on my life, I could wait for you until I'm 100 years old, if that's what it took.
You're such a wonderful, handsome, charming man. You're amazing. I love you now, I'll love you when I'm 100, and I'll love you for every bit in between.
yours,
m.g.e.
Being with you is a time that I treasure so much. I feel comfortable, I forget all my worries, I laugh more than ever... You just put a smile on my face without fail and it drives me crazy that every night, at some point, I have to leave and go home, where you aren't there.
My biggest complaint, I guess, is that you are home, so leaving you really just means I'm kind of lost.
But anyway. The most important part is that I get to see you, period. You bring me so much joy, and I'm incredibly blessed to have you as my sweetheart. I don't deserve it whatsoever.
And you know, it's not such a bad thing when the only problem I have with you is that you're not with me, right now. But that'll change someday. And I cannot wait for it. I feel like a broken record, because I'm sure you get the point: I love you, I don't see you as often as I would like, and I can't wait to get married so I can spend every night with my best friend.
But I regret nothing. You should know how intense and out-of-this-world my love is for you. You should be reminded every day until you can anticipate the exact words I'm going to say. And even then, I'll still tell you it, because that's how much you mean to me, and that's how much you should know that my feelings for you will never diminish.
So yes, waiting can suck a lot. But you're worth it. For the amount of positivity and light you've shed on my life, I could wait for you until I'm 100 years old, if that's what it took.
You're such a wonderful, handsome, charming man. You're amazing. I love you now, I'll love you when I'm 100, and I'll love you for every bit in between.
yours,
m.g.e.
Friday, September 12, 2014
15
As the title might suggest, there are currently 15 days until our second year anniversary.
It's funny, because it hardly feels like two years have passed. I mean, so many things have happened. And at the same time, I feel as if we've been together forever. If you think about it, two years is minuscule in comparison to how many years I plan on spending with you. {Say, the rest of our lives.}
The moment we entered this relationship {even before that}, it felt like we'd been together for decades. We just fit into this beautiful, comfortable relationship. We'd known each other for a while by then, but we'd never entered into a good friendship until after high school.
What's funny is that now, while we're constantly learning about each other {because in a healthy relationship, you never stop learning}, I just laugh to myself. I've told you multiple times: we should've been friends in high school.
We were talking about music we liked in high school the other day, and there were so many similarities. We even had similar interests in TV shows. In particular, every Wednesday of every week, in our own worlds, we would both watch Chuck as it aired.
Now, I'm all about timing. And far be it from me to even pretend God's timing is anything but perfect. But isn't it crazy that we were so close, without even knowing it?
We were silly kids, let me tell you. I'm glad we came together when we did, though. You have been nothing short of a miracle.
And now, look at us. 2 years down, many more to go. You're going to be my partner for life and I cannot wait. We have so much ahead of us and it's so exciting that I get to be a part of your life.
Thanks for the amazing 1 year and 350 days. And thank you even more for the years to come. I love you so much.
yours,
m.g.e.
It's funny, because it hardly feels like two years have passed. I mean, so many things have happened. And at the same time, I feel as if we've been together forever. If you think about it, two years is minuscule in comparison to how many years I plan on spending with you. {Say, the rest of our lives.}
The moment we entered this relationship {even before that}, it felt like we'd been together for decades. We just fit into this beautiful, comfortable relationship. We'd known each other for a while by then, but we'd never entered into a good friendship until after high school.
What's funny is that now, while we're constantly learning about each other {because in a healthy relationship, you never stop learning}, I just laugh to myself. I've told you multiple times: we should've been friends in high school.
We were talking about music we liked in high school the other day, and there were so many similarities. We even had similar interests in TV shows. In particular, every Wednesday of every week, in our own worlds, we would both watch Chuck as it aired.
Now, I'm all about timing. And far be it from me to even pretend God's timing is anything but perfect. But isn't it crazy that we were so close, without even knowing it?
We were silly kids, let me tell you. I'm glad we came together when we did, though. You have been nothing short of a miracle.
And now, look at us. 2 years down, many more to go. You're going to be my partner for life and I cannot wait. We have so much ahead of us and it's so exciting that I get to be a part of your life.
Thanks for the amazing 1 year and 350 days. And thank you even more for the years to come. I love you so much.
yours,
m.g.e.
accomplishments!
I'd just like to take this time to remind you how far you've come, my love.
First, you graduated college this year. On time. Not everyone can say they did that. {Not even sure I will. Whoops.} You pushed through all the ridiculous parking {or lack thereof}, fees that every college seems to pull out of thin air, overdose of books {e.g., that one book you bought for that one sentence on that one particular page}, group projects from the devil, midterms and finals that caused gray hairs...
You did it. And you did it well, because you worked so hard and you made an effort in all your classes. You were so dedicated that you would go home early from my house on some nights, just to study more. While I'm glad this doesn't have to be a thing anymore, I admire how hard you worked.
And now look where you are! You're earning above minimum wage at a job that you do extremely well at. But it doesn't stop there, because you're once again working your butt off to find a full time job. And that's not easy. {I mean, this is coming from the girlwho got rejected by Chipotle.}
But then there's you. You're getting interviews, you're impressing a ton of people, and you're sending out applications to even more jobs. You won't stop until you find what you want and what you need. It can get discouraging, with all the criteria out there and the awful economy. Yet you still keep pushing forward.
And I'm so proud of you. I hope you know that and that I communicate it enough to you. Because I really, truly am. You're such an inspiration to me to work harder.
I've wanted to give up on my own scholastic career so many times. But I realize my end goal: you. Then life doesn't seem so difficult.
I'm pushing myself because you've made that much of an impact on me. {I mean, I wouldn't be allowed to quit school even if I tried, BUT there has to be something that keeps me from allowing myself to slip into a below average grade state. And that's you.}
So thanks for the inspiration, sweetheart. Again - I'm SO proud of you. You're such an awesome gentleman. I love you.
yours,
m.g.e.
First, you graduated college this year. On time. Not everyone can say they did that. {Not even sure I will. Whoops.} You pushed through all the ridiculous parking {or lack thereof}, fees that every college seems to pull out of thin air, overdose of books {e.g., that one book you bought for that one sentence on that one particular page}, group projects from the devil, midterms and finals that caused gray hairs...
You did it. And you did it well, because you worked so hard and you made an effort in all your classes. You were so dedicated that you would go home early from my house on some nights, just to study more. While I'm glad this doesn't have to be a thing anymore, I admire how hard you worked.
And now look where you are! You're earning above minimum wage at a job that you do extremely well at. But it doesn't stop there, because you're once again working your butt off to find a full time job. And that's not easy. {I mean, this is coming from the girl
But then there's you. You're getting interviews, you're impressing a ton of people, and you're sending out applications to even more jobs. You won't stop until you find what you want and what you need. It can get discouraging, with all the criteria out there and the awful economy. Yet you still keep pushing forward.
And I'm so proud of you. I hope you know that and that I communicate it enough to you. Because I really, truly am. You're such an inspiration to me to work harder.
I've wanted to give up on my own scholastic career so many times. But I realize my end goal: you. Then life doesn't seem so difficult.
I'm pushing myself because you've made that much of an impact on me. {I mean, I wouldn't be allowed to quit school even if I tried, BUT there has to be something that keeps me from allowing myself to slip into a below average grade state. And that's you.}
So thanks for the inspiration, sweetheart. Again - I'm SO proud of you. You're such an awesome gentleman. I love you.
yours,
m.g.e.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
weirdness
Something I really appreciate and adore about you is the fact that you've seen my weird side... and you still love me.
Now, this weird side is ever-present, but sometimes I just get hyped up on caffeine or lack of sleep and it's all downhill from there. As if that wasn't bad enough, I just get restless, and I want to get up and do something, have your attention on me, and relax - all at the same time.
Like tonight, I wanted to make plans to go to the beach. I don't tan, I burn, and when I do go to the beach, I can't just lay around basking in the sun because I get {once again} restless. {Could this be a sign of ADHD? We'll pretend it's not.} But I, nevertheless, wanted to go the beach. In all likelihood, it's because going anywhere is 110% better when you're there. So yeah, sure, going to the beach with you makes sense. But the fact I never go to the beach on my own time just...says a lot about me.
And your response? "Okay, it's your pick." You're so... accepting of my personality.
The fact that I choose to go to the beach, even though that's a rare occurrence? You don't even question it.
But the same goes for everything else. When I make a weird joke, you actually laugh, because either 1) you understand what I mean and genuinely think it's funny, or 2) you just know I'm the silliest thing on the planet, and weird jokes come with being in a relationship with me. Either way.
And then there are those days where I go from perfectly happy to incredibly self conscious about myself {my complex with my giant forehead, for example}. You immediately deny any self conscious thoughts, without even questioning the quick change. And I know that can be frustrating, because you hate when I berate myself.
I don't know - this whole post itself is weird in that it's sort of all over the place. So I hope you can interpret my weirdness once again. And understand that that right there is something I love about you. You're incredibly accepting, and I never thought I'd find someone as perfectly compatible for me as you.
I, weirdness and all, love you.
yours,
m.g.e.
Now, this weird side is ever-present, but sometimes I just get hyped up on caffeine or lack of sleep and it's all downhill from there. As if that wasn't bad enough, I just get restless, and I want to get up and do something, have your attention on me, and relax - all at the same time.
Like tonight, I wanted to make plans to go to the beach. I don't tan, I burn, and when I do go to the beach, I can't just lay around basking in the sun because I get {once again} restless. {Could this be a sign of ADHD? We'll pretend it's not.} But I, nevertheless, wanted to go the beach. In all likelihood, it's because going anywhere is 110% better when you're there. So yeah, sure, going to the beach with you makes sense. But the fact I never go to the beach on my own time just...says a lot about me.
And your response? "Okay, it's your pick." You're so... accepting of my personality.
The fact that I choose to go to the beach, even though that's a rare occurrence? You don't even question it.
But the same goes for everything else. When I make a weird joke, you actually laugh, because either 1) you understand what I mean and genuinely think it's funny, or 2) you just know I'm the silliest thing on the planet, and weird jokes come with being in a relationship with me. Either way.
And then there are those days where I go from perfectly happy to incredibly self conscious about myself {my complex with my giant forehead, for example}. You immediately deny any self conscious thoughts, without even questioning the quick change. And I know that can be frustrating, because you hate when I berate myself.
I don't know - this whole post itself is weird in that it's sort of all over the place. So I hope you can interpret my weirdness once again. And understand that that right there is something I love about you. You're incredibly accepting, and I never thought I'd find someone as perfectly compatible for me as you.
I, weirdness and all, love you.
yours,
m.g.e.
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
blue eyes
I don't think I tell you enough how much I love your eyes.
They're this gorgeous hue of blue, surrounded by the longest, darkest eyelashes that I've been blessed to set eyes on.
You probably notice that I like to take your glasses off. I figure, the more of your face and extremely attractive eyes that I can see, the better.
Want to know something else? I think you're adorable when you sleep. It's not often you let yourself fall asleep when we're together, and it's even less often that you're asleep and I'm not {college student/recent graduate, am I right?}. But when I do look over and see your eyes shut, ahh. You're so cute.
A long time ago, when we were in high school together, one of our classmates took a picture of you and a friend asleep on the bus {we were going on a trip}. I have to say, even when I first saw that picture, I didn't know it was possible to be that attractive when asleep.
But you managed it. Miraculous, but not surprising at all. It's you, after all.
So I guess you could say I just really like your eyes. And when the sunlight hits them at the right angle... I swear I could swim in those pools of blue.
Whenever we decide to have kids {multiple years in the future}, I hope they get your eyes. Those long lashes? They'll be thanking you and praising God that they didn't get my blonde ones.
I hope we never get tired of just staring into each other's eyes. I mean, I guess it's okay if you get tired of it, because I'll always be mesmerized by you.
I love you, my dearest.
yours,
m.g.e.
They're this gorgeous hue of blue, surrounded by the longest, darkest eyelashes that I've been blessed to set eyes on.
You probably notice that I like to take your glasses off. I figure, the more of your face and extremely attractive eyes that I can see, the better.
Want to know something else? I think you're adorable when you sleep. It's not often you let yourself fall asleep when we're together, and it's even less often that you're asleep and I'm not {college student/recent graduate, am I right?}. But when I do look over and see your eyes shut, ahh. You're so cute.
A long time ago, when we were in high school together, one of our classmates took a picture of you and a friend asleep on the bus {we were going on a trip}. I have to say, even when I first saw that picture, I didn't know it was possible to be that attractive when asleep.
But you managed it. Miraculous, but not surprising at all. It's you, after all.
So I guess you could say I just really like your eyes. And when the sunlight hits them at the right angle... I swear I could swim in those pools of blue.
Whenever we decide to have kids {multiple years in the future}, I hope they get your eyes. Those long lashes? They'll be thanking you and praising God that they didn't get my blonde ones.
I hope we never get tired of just staring into each other's eyes. I mean, I guess it's okay if you get tired of it, because I'll always be mesmerized by you.
I love you, my dearest.
yours,
m.g.e.
Friday, September 5, 2014
rest
Sleep. You of all people, dear soulmate, know that I cherish my sleep. I'm just a sleepy person, and I blame most of it on school and two bad weeks of insomnia this past summer.
But one thing that really, really amazes me is that you actually tolerate my crazy sleeping schedule. You just accept it, no judging involved. {Remember that one time I fell asleep in the movie theater on your birthday? Yeah. [And just a friendly reminder that I DID stay up late/get up early because I was actually working hard. So.]}
And then there are those moments when we're relaxing, and you're so comfortable, so I get drowsy. You tell me without hesitation, "Lay down, take a nap." You'll move into a better position, put a pillow on your lap, and invite me to lay my head down. Just like that.
I even woke up once and found that you'd been covering my ears because people were walking around and being loud. On multiple occasions at your house, no matter what we're doing, you'll immediately go and get a blanket for me because I'm always cold. You just cuddle up with me and let me rest.
And when I'm not feeling well? Again, you just tell me to slow down and rest. You're magnificently good at slowing me down when I'm going a thousand miles an hour. And that is no easy task.
And the point of this isn't that I have a sleeping problem {which is debatable, but that's another topic for another day}, nor is it that you just want me to sleep all the time.
The point is, that you are so good at making me comfortable. You just do it because you're the sweetest man alive and you're entirely selfless. I would never ask for you to put me before yourself {quite the opposite}, but you do it anyway. You're always thinking of others' happiness.
I wouldn't have been surprised at some point if you'd just gone, "Listen... how about you get some sleep at night like a normal person?" {Granted, I do need to do that..} You're just incredibly accepting and you make me comfortable and safe. Physically and emotionally. You've got it all covered.
So thank you for letting me get my rest. Whenever we're together, you let my body rest, but my mind also immediately is at rest too. I really appreciate you.
And I really love you.
yours,
m.g.e.
yours,
m.g.e.
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